*Updates at the bottom.

Dwight Howard – Houston Rockets – four-years, $88 million
Finally, he made a good decision. Now cut the crap and deliver.

Josh Smith – Detroit Pistons – four-years, $54 million
You can’t skip steps, Joe; I thought you would have learnt that by now. Greg Monroe and Andre Drummond are your future, so how does this fit? Have you watched Josh Smith? He can’t play the three; he’s a career 28% three-point shooter, and he clearly doesn’t know the difference between a good shot and a bad shot. Unless they’re going to make a trade here, he doesn’t fit, both strategically or mentally (this is not the guy you want on a bad rebuilding team).

Just like 2009 when you spent your cap space on Ben Gordon and Charlie Villanueva, you’ve jumped the gun again, Joe.

Question: how the hell does this guy still have a job?

Andrew Bynum – Cleveland Cavaliers – two-years, $24.5 million (Note: $6 million guaranteed in the first year; second year team option)
Yeah, good luck with that.

Andre Iguodala – Golden State Warriors – four-years, $48 million
They gave up a lot to get him (draft picks to Utah; the chance to re-sign Jack and Landry) but I love it. Their motives are clear – they want to play small ball and they want to shed David Lee’s albatross contract.

Health permitting, this team could be naasty – two elite defenders (Bogut/Iggy), two elite shooters (Curry/Thompson) and a guy who does a bit of both (Barnes). Wow!

Best team in the league to watch, and it’s not close.

Chris Paul – Los Angeles Clippers – five-years, $107 million
A no-brainer, for both parties.

J.J. Redick – LA Clippers – four years, $27 million
Finally, they have some (quality) support around Paul and Griffin. In Redick and Jared Dudley (acquired via trade) they now have two perimeter starters with high IQ, well-rounded games and the ability to shoot the lights out, which will give Paul and Griffin more room to operate. I’m still a bit worried about their interior defense and bench bigs, but with these moves and Doc Rivers at the helm they’re shaping up as a legit contender now (they were not a contender last year).

Kevin Martin – Minnesota Timberwolves – four-years, $28 million
He’s not worth the contract – he’s a one-dimensional player who grades out as one of the worst defenders in the league, but, the T-Wolves desperately need shooting so he fills a need. They’ll have to hide him on D, though; he’s freakin’ awful.

Corey Brewer – Minnesota Timberwolves – three-years, $15-million
Nice move. If they stay healthy (a big ‘if’) this team has the potential to replicate what Golden State did last year.

Mike Dunleavy – Chicago Bulls – two-years, $6 million
A decent player (albeit injury prone) but he won’t move the needle for the Bulls. For three straight years now they’ve desperately needed that second high quality creator to take the pressure off Rose when they’re facing elite competition in the playoffs. Dunleavy doesn’t solve that problem.

David West – Indiana Pacers – three-years, $36 million
A bit steep but I suppose he’s worth it on this team.

Chris Kaman – Los Angeles Lakers – one-year, $3.2 million
Honestly, I don’t know why anyone bothers with this guy. He’s strictly an offensive center, but he’s not good at offense anymore, and he’s chronically injured. Shows how desperate the Lakers are, I guess.

Tiago Splitter – San Antonio Spurs – four-years, $36 million
That’s the going rate for a 7-footer who can walk and chew gum at the same time. I’m glad it’s not my team, though.

Manu Ginobili – San Antonio Spurs – two-years, $14 million
Well that’s generous. Manu’s cooked.

J.R. Smith – New York Knicks – three-years, $18 million
The Knicks didn’t really have a choice here – they’re capped out and they desperately need that second scorer. But, you know, it’s J.R. Smith. The talent is undeniably there, but the head isn’t. If he’s your number 2 guy, you’re in trouble.

Tony Allen – Memphis Grizzlies – four-years, $20 million
I know he’s an elite defender but that’s a lot to pay for a guy who can’t shoot and who proved to be a liability deep in the playoffs. And he’s 31.

Tyreke Evans – New Orleans Pelicans – four-years, $44 million
Presumably they’re trying to move Eric Gordon because these two fit together like chalk and cheese. But I like the gamble. There’s a big-time player somewhere in there, he just needs the right environment to flush it out.

Al Jefferson – Charlotte Bobcats – three-years, $41 million
After years of playing on bad teams you’d think Jefferson would want to play on a winner. Turns out, he prefers the dosh.

He’ll make the Bobcats better but only marginally, and really, to what end? They’ll still be a lottery team but now they risk being in the 5-8 slot in the draft and thus missing out on the cream of the crop. And with franchise changers like Wiggins, Parker and Randle finally on the horizon, that could keep them in purgatory for a looong time.

Chase Budinger – Minnesota Timberwolves – three-years, $16 million
A good deal, if he can stay on the floor.

Andray Blatche – Brooklyn Nets – one-year, $1.4 million
Bit of a headcase, but a bargain at that price.

Martell Webster – Washington Wizards – four-years, $22 million
That’s nuts.

Paul Millsap – Atlanta Hawks – two-years, $19 million
A good deal but I can’t see the point of all this.

Kyle Korver – Atlanta Hawks – four- years, $24 million
Steep, and ditto, what’s the point?

Jarrett Jack – Cleveland Cavaliers – four-years, $25 million
He’ll undoubtedly make them better and help take the pressure off Kyrie to run the team. But, is that smart heading into the 2014 mega draft?

Carl Landry – Sacramento Kings – four-years, $26 million
I’m really bummed out about this one. I’m a Carl Landry fan; as your first big off the bench you can’t do much better. Last season he finally played on a good team and made a huge impact, but now he’s back on a bad/anonymous team in a forward logjam. Maybe they’ve guaranteed him the starting 4 spot? I’m just disappointed.

Marco Belinelli – San Antonio Spurs – two-years, $6 million
A good pick-up; Belinelli is underrated.

Jose Calderon – Dallas Mavericks – four-years, $29 million
I don’t understand this, do you? Just fess up and tank for god sake.

Devin Harris – Dallas Mavericks – three-years, $9 million
Dirk’s not stupid, you know.
(UPDATE: Due to injury, the Mavs have rescinded this offer)

Wayne Ellington – Dallas Mavericks – two-years, $5-million
Don’t get me wrong, Ellington is decent, but I’ve never felt more sorry for an NBA player like I do now with Dirk. Sad.

Randy Foye – Denver Nuggets – three-years, $9 million
The sort of guy who will only ever be a factor if he plays on a good team, strictly as a spot-up shooter off the pine. Anything else and he’s irrelevant.

Marreese Speights – Golden State Warriors – three-years, $11 million
He’s not as good as Carl Landry but he’s not a stiff either; he’s got a decent game. But, whenever he lands on a new team they seemingly can’t wait to get rid of him, so that’s a concern.

Jermaine O’Neal – Golden State Warriors – one-year, $2 million
Not bad as some insurance behind Bogut. But this is another guy with a so-so reputation; the book on O’Neal is that he doesn’t handle limited minutes too well (i.e. he thinks he’s better than he is). Well, when Ezeli comes back from injury he’s the third-string center, so I hope he understands that.

Toney Douglas – Golden State Warriors – one-year, $1.6 million
He got a bad rap in New York and when he was finally given an opportunity for consistent minutes and a defined role in Houston, he played well. Good value for money and I think he’ll surprise a few people.

Chris Anderson – Miami Heat – one-year, $1.7 million
Expected.

O.J. Mayo – Milwaukee Bucks – three-years, $24 million
O.J. – you could have been a nice piece on a good team.

Carlos Delfino – Milwaukee Bucks – two-years, $6.5 million
Like with everything they do, I don’t see the point.

Zaza Pachulia – Milwaukee Bucks – three-years, $16 million
It’s official – they’re now the worst run franchise in the NBA.

Chris Copeland – Indiana Pacers – two-years, $6 million
There are question marks. Is he a one year wonder? Can he defend at even a passable level?

C.J. Watson – Indiana Pacers – two-years, $4 million
He’s better than D.J. Augustin.

Matt Barnes – Los Angeles Clippers – three-years, $11 million
A good deal for both sides.

Darren Collison – Los Angeles Clippers – two-years, $4 million
With Chris Paul’s injury history it is essential that the Clippers have a quality back-up behind him, and they’ve found a pretty decent one here.

Ryan Hollins – Los Angeles Clippers – one-year, $1.3 million
He’s pretty useless.

Tyler Hansbrough – Toronto Raptors – two-years, $6 million
They need toughness on the inside and that’s not going to break the bank, so good move. People bag this guy but I think that’s off base; as a ball buster off the bench in limited minutes he can be effective, especially in the postseason.

Francisco Garcia – Houston Rockets – two-years, $2.6 million
Great price; Garcia can shoot.

Omri Casspi – Houston Rockets – two-years, $2 million
Worth a punt.

Reggie Williams – Houston Rockets – two-years, $2.4 million
You see what they’re doing here? Shooting.

J.J. Hickson – Denver Nuggets – three-years, $15 million
He’s worth the contract but you wouldn’t him sharing the floor with McGee too often.

Eric Maynor – Washington Wizards – two-years, $4 million
A nice player to have behind John Wall.

Jeff Pendergraph – San Antonio Spurs – two-years, $4 million
Good pick-up; he will surprise people if he ever gets consistent minutes. Only problem, he’s a 6-9 banger, and so is Aron Baynes. They’ll have to fight for playing time.

Earl Clark – Cleveland Cavaliers – two-years, $9 million
The Cavs have nothing at the 3, so it’s worth a crack. Clark can play.

Jordan Farmar – Los Angeles Lakers – one-year, $1.3 million
Like I said, desperate.

Earl Watson – Portland Trail Blazers – one-year, $1.4 million
There are worse back-up point guards.

Dorell Wright – Portland Trail Blazers – two-years, $6 million
I don’t like his injury history.

Pablo Prigioni – New York Knicks – three-years, $6 million
He’s ancient but he can play, and he’s cheap, so not the worst move. Not sure about the three years though.

Shaun Livingston – Brooklyn Nets – one-year, $1.3 million
I like it. In the right role on a good team he could be handy.

Anthony Morrow – New Orleans Pelicans – two-years, $2.2 million
There’s nothing there except the shooting.

Will Bynum – Detroit Pistons – two-years, $5.75 million
He probably could have done with a change of scenery.

Greg Stiemsma – New Orleans Pelicans – one-year, $2.7 million
“The Steamer”. That’s all.

Josh McRoberts – Charlotte Bobcats – two-years, $6.2 million
Who cares.

** UPDATES **

Chauncey Billups – Detroit Pistons – two-years, $5 million
He’s washed up as a player but maybe he can talk some sense into Josh Smith and help guide the young guys. I don’t like it though.

Nick Young – Los Angeles Lakers – one-year, $1.2 million
Yeah, Kobe’s going to love this guy….

Andrei Kirilenko – Brooklyn Nets – two-years, $6.4 million
Ok, the Nets are really dangerous now. They legitimately go two deep at every position – (C) Lopez, Evans (PF) Garnett, Blatche (SF) Pierce, Kirilenko (SG) Johnson, Terry (PG) Williams, Livingston. A LOT depends on health but they’re a big-time threat.

Ronny Turiaf – Minnesota Timberwolves – two-years, $3.2 million
Not bad as end-of-bench filler.

Monta Ellis – Dallas Mavericks – three-years, $28 million
And who exactly were they bidding against? What a turd sandwich this is.

Jeff Teague – Atlanta Hawks – four-years, $32 million (matched Milwaukee’s offer sheet)
$8 million per year for Jeff Teague? Madness.

Wesley Johnson – Los Angeles Lakers – one-year, $1 million
Despite his physical gifts, he’s allergic to the paint. Soft.

John Lucas III – Utah Jazz – two-years, $3.2 million
It doesn’t change the plan – an all out tank job (which I applaud them on – one of the few teams with enough balls to do it).

Elton Brand – Atlanta Hawks – one-year, $4 million
As previously mentioned I don’t really understand what they’re gunning for here. 40 wins, at best? If I were them I would have a) stripped it all back and tanked, or b) done the sign and trade with Milwaukee (Jennings for Teague), leaving them with a core of Al Horford, Paul Millsap and Brandon Jennings. At least that’s something you can build on and has potential.

Metta World Peace – New York Knicks – two-years, $3.2 million (amnestied by the Lakers)
There’s an unwritten rule in the NBA that most teams are aware of. That is, there is a limit to how many headcases one team can carry (answer = 1). Exceed that limit and it will eventually bring you down. Well, the Knicks have. (They crossed it last season with Smith, Kenyon Martin and I would argue that Melo is part headcase as well (remember his incident with KG in the Garden last season, and subsequent postgame meltdown?)).

Headcase issues aside, MWP is pretty bloody useless these days anyway.

Samuel Dalembert – Dallas Mavericks – two-years, $7.5 million
Speaking of headcases, this guy has no idea what his limitations are (i.e. he thinks he has post moves – he doesn’t). Rick Carlisle will hate him.

Jason Maxiell – Orlando Magic – two-years, $5 million
He could be handy as a 8th-9th man on a contender. But on a bad Magic team, that already has an undersized power forward in Big Baby Davis? Absolutely pointless.

Aaron Brooks – Houston Rockets – one-year, $1 million
Can score, can’t pass, can’t defend. Best days are behind him.

Byron Mullens – Los Angeles Clippers – two-years, $2 million
The Clippers desperately need interior defense and rebounding, and Mullens, despite being 7 feet, does neither. Shooting isn’t everything, people.

Nate Robinson – Denver Nuggets – two-years, $4 million
For his production, that’s a bargain. But his personality will always be an issue.

Brandan Wright – Dallas Mavericks – two-years, $10 million
A pretty decent player, but he’s injury prone.

Kenyon Martin – New York Knicks – $1.4 million
Their collection of headcases is laughable – Martin, Metta World Peace, J.R. Smith and with his brain-snap against Boston last season, among other incidents, you’ve got to throw Melo in there too. Crazy team (in a bad way).

Derek Fisher – Oklahoma City Thunder – $1.4 million
He still hits the occasional big shot but the rest of his game has gone to shit. As their only signing for the summer, that’s disappointing.

Mike Miller – Memphis Grizzlies – two-years, $2.4 million (amnestied by Miami)
True, he made an impact in both the 2012 and 2013 Finals, but apart from that, for the last three years (and longer) he’s done nothing, both in terms of performance and being healthy enough to just get on the floor. He’s made of tissue paper and that’s a problem. But the Grizz desperately need shooting and the cost is minimal, so I can understand the gamble.


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