“NBA isn’t MLB. At the end of the day, this analytic stuff doesn’t work in basketball.”
- Former coach Larry Brown.

Yeah, stats lie….

“I’m calling on the Supreme Leader of North Korea or as I call him ‘Kim’, to do me a solid and cut Kenneth Bae loose.”
- Dennis Rodman on Twitter to his ‘good friend’ Kim Jong Un, the North Korean dictator, to do him a ‘solid’ and release American prisoner Kenneth Bae. Bae, a devout Christian who worked as a tour operator near the China-North Korea border, was sentenced to 15 years of hard labour earlier this month for undisclosed ‘hostile acts’.

This guy.

“Is Tom Thibodeau fun to play for? I wouldn’t . . . eh . . . no. Let’s not get carried away.”
- Chicago’s Joakim Noah when asked if it’s fun playing for coach Tom Thibodeau.

If a coach is ‘fun’ to play for, he’s probably not a great coach.

“player, can you pass a drug test? [grabs table] TODAY?!?”

And this:

“anyone who is projected ahead of U that U think U R better than?” ALL OF THEM “Have you ever seen them play?” NEVER”
- Houston GM Daryl Morey on Twitter revealing some of the best interview answers he’s ever heard from prospective draft picks.

Gold!!

“Losses have an amazing property for us. It cleans the wax out of our ears.”
- Miami’s Shane Battier after the Heat won Game 3 in Indiana, having previously dropped Game 2 at home.

Yeah, it does appear that they need that from time to time.

“It was clear to us that Larry’s track record in Atlanta … make him the right choice to lead our club.”
- Bucks GM John Hammond on hiring former Atlanta head coach Larry Drew.

Is their mandate to be mediocre? It sure looks like it.

“No offense to New York, but I’m so, so happy I didn’t fall to them in the draft.”
- The Warriors’ Steph Curry. Curry was selected 7th in the 2009 draft; New York had the 8th pick.

Ha.

“There’s been general talk to consider expansion in the future after the TV deal is negotiated.”
- NBA Commissioner David Stern after the relocation committee voted in favour of the Kings staying in Sacramento, opening the possibility that Seattle could still get an NBA franchise via expansion.

Expansion? That’s nuts; if anything, they should be contracting.

“Congratulations. Welcome to the Titanic.”
- Charles Barkley’s message to Jeff Hornacek after being hired as the new coach of the Phoenix Suns.

The Suns have a reasonably clean cap sheet going forward, so it’s not all bad. But yeah, right now, it’s a train wreck.

“I’m riding coattails now. [Parker] has been great. He’s the reason we’re here.”
- The Spurs’ Tim Duncan on Tony Parker.

True, but Timmy has been phenomenal.

“This move allows us to go forward, and now we’re not making moves with a gun to our head anymore. Now, whatever we do from this point forward, it’s stuff we can do because we want to, not because we have to. But we had to take that bad medicine first with those first two trades.”
- Memphis’ VP of Basketball Operations John Hollinger on the Rudy Gay trade.

This guy knows what he’s doing.

“I’m a guy that believes, again, that God has his hands on this team.”
- Warriors’ coach Mark Jackson.

Sure.

“It helped change the culture. Obviously it was easier to pull the trigger because we knew what we had in Klay [Thompson] and it was time for him to be a starting two-guard. And he does everything right.” (How did that trade change the culture?) “It helped change the culture.” (Anything specific?) “You know.”
- Mark Jackson on the Monta Ellis trade.

Yes, we know. Removing Ellis was always going to be addition by subtraction.

(So I wonder, is this decision (firing Vinny Del Negro) being made because the players are now calling the shots? Am I off base?) “No, you’re not off base. This is a players’ league, and, unfortunately, if you want to win you have to make the players happy. Don’t you think that’s true?”
- Clippers owner Donald Sterling to a reporter.

Absolutely true, but really?

“Well, Chris is a free agent. They were compelled to make a decision. He’s entitled to his opinion. He’s a free agent and he’s going to have a lot of say on a lot of things as he did in the previous summer when we put the team together.”
- Former Clipper coach Vinny Del Negro on Chris Paul.

Understandable; he’s just connecting the dots.

“He’s angry right now and his anger is directed toward the Clippers organization. Chris is a man of principle and if he feels like you’ve gone against his principles, it will affect how he feels about you.”
- A source close to Chris Paul, in response to the above comments.

Err, not good.

“That theory is wrong, I guess.”
- LeBron James after his game-winning lay-up, going left, against Paul George in Game 1 of the ECF against Indiana. He was referencing a recent comment made by Michael Jordan that he doesn’t go left.

MJ wrong? How about that.

“One thing I’ve learned since I’ve been here is what you really have to sacrifice in order to be on a winning team. A case in point is guarding Roy Hibbert. If I had my choice, I [wouldn't] want to wrestle with that guy for a whole game. Him and David West? Well, David West I probably have to — but not Roy Hibbert.”
- Miami’s Chris Bosh during the Indiana series.

It shows.

“I wasn’t playing like my normal self. Roles changed a little bit, they wanted me to focus more on being a defensive player and spot-up shooter. I have a whole summer to get involved in doing a lot of spot-up shots, and working on my role, what it is going to be next year and whatnot. I’ll be prepared for that, a lot better than I was this year.”
- Boston’s Courtney Lee on his disappointing season.

“they wanted me to focus more on being a defensive player and spot-up shooter.”???? Dude, that’s all you are, and probably ever will be.

“Derrick’s a brother and to see him go through this is tough, but at the end of the day it’s really funny how quick people are to judge. But people don’t know what it’s like to lead a team, especially after you tore your ACL. If you tore your ACL and you have to be the starting point guard and have the expectations that Derrick has, then maybe you can judge, but everybody who hasn’t been in that situation before should really shut up because I feel like it’s just so unfair to him and to this team. We’re fighting, and everybody’s going to just s— on somebody who’s been giving so much to this organization. It’s crazy to me.”
- Joakim Noah in support of Derrick Rose.

Amen.

“Michael was more charismatic and gregarious than Kobe. He loved hanging out with his teammates and security guards, playing cards, smoking cigars, and joking around. Kobe is different. He was reserved as a teenager, in part because he was younger than the other players and hadn’t developed strong social skills in college. When Kobe first joined the Lakers, he avoided fraternizing with his teammates. But his inclination to keep to himself shifted as he grew older. Increasingly, Kobe put more energy into getting to know the other players, especially when the team was on the road. Jordan was also more naturally inclined to let the game come to him and not overplay his hand, whereas Kobe tends to force the action, especially when the game isn’t going his way. When his shot is off, Kobe will pound away relentlessly until his luck turns. Michael, on the other hand, would shift his attention to defense or passing or setting screens to help the team win the game.”
- Phil Jackson, comparing Michael Jordan and Kobe Bryant.

An interesting insight.

”I went from wanting to trade him on the spot to wanting to cook breakfast for him tomorrow morning. ‘That’s the truth. When I talk to him and say, ‘Manu,’ he goes, ‘This is what I do.’ That’s what he’s going to tell me. I stopped coaching him a long time ago.”
- Spurs coach Gregg Popovich on Manu Ginobili, who hit the game winning shot in Game 1 against Golden State in the second round. On the prior possession Ginobili took an ill-advised 3 that appeared to cost the Spurs the game.

Classic Pop.

“I’ll have an omelette with mushroom.”
- The Spurs’ Manu Ginobili plays along.

Nice one.

“The longer you are out, the more difficult it is to get back in… Right now it’s not in the best interest of my family.”
- Stan Van Gundy on returning to coaching.

That’s a shame; the NBA is a more entertaining place with Stan in it.

“Money. Money is always the [thing]. People say public scorn, the humilation. Guys could care less if they’re publicly humiliated. If they want to put an opera of all my charges on there or flops or whatever, go for it. You take $10 from me, and I’m upset. Money. No one cares. In our society now, labels don’t matter. They change every 10 minutes, so who cares? But money — that hurts. I hate to sound like a capitalist, but that’s much more effective than public humiliation. In a perfect world, we’d all love to be stoic, immovable forces, that the force of very large men throwing themselves into you doesn’t affect you. Yeah, it’d be great. But unfortunately, there’s a thing called physics involved, and it seems to win out more often than not.”
- Miami’s Shane Battier on flopping.

Suspensions – that’s what needs to happen.

“I don’t know my ceiling. I don’t stop trying to improve my game — just like today, being in here with Rio and Ray, the last guys to leave the court. I want to continue to maximize what I have.”
- Four-time MVP LeBron James.

Scary.

“Really?? Me. Retire?? Soon, but not yet Vino still has work to do”
- The Lakers’ Kobe Bryant on Twitter when asked if he is thinking retirement.

This guy ain’t goin’ anywhere.

“We just haven’t considered using the provision. We think Perk has a lot of value to our team.”
- OKC GM Sam Presti when asked if they will use the amnesty clause on Kendrick Perkins.

Perkins is pretty useless but they sort of missed the boat on that one (i.e. it wouldn’t have solved all their financial issues, but they should have kept Harden and amnestied Perkins). Now, it won’t make much difference either way.

“So much of coaching is you cheat your family. I wanted Kim [his wife] to be here and my daughter Kaci because I know I’m cheating them.”
- Denver coach George Karl when accepting his Coach of the Year award.

It’s got to be hard for the families. Everyone talks up these dudes who ‘live in the gym’, but what about their loved ones at home?

“Y’all are looking SHAAAKYY BAAABYY…..That Thunder team just looked shook.”
- Houston’s Royce White tweeted this to Kevin Durant during OKC’s Game 5 loss to Houston.

Whaa????

“Who is that? I haven’t seen him on the bench. I haven’t seen him on the bench. So, I mean, I’m not worried about guys that’s not even in our series. Ain’t that the guy that’s afraid to fly? Well I wish him the best, man, and if I see him next year I’ll let him know who we are.”
- OKC’s Kevin Durant responds.

I wouldn’t count on it KD; the chances that this clown ever steps onto an NBA court are slim to none.

“I dont know the last team that played small ball to win a championship. Knicks are definitely more than capable for a 2013 banner.”
- The Lakers’ Metta World Peace on Twitter.

The 2012 Miami Heat, Metta.

“He needs to work on his head first.”
- Washington coach Randy Wittman when asked if Jan Vesely needs to focus on improving his jumpshot this offseason.

Another draft flop for the Wiz.

“We’re more than 1 player away unless it’s a great player. It’ll be tough to become a championship team from where we are.”
- Boston GM Danny Ainge.

Just tear it down, Danny.

(When asked what the key has been for taking DeAndre Jordan out of his game in Memphis) “What is his game?” (On holding DeAndre Jordan to two rebounds) “Nobody holds anybody to two rebounds. You either get them or you don’t get them.”
- Memphis coach Lionel Hollins on DeAndre Jordan during their first round series against the Clippers.

Straight shooter.


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