After writing an emotionally draining piece and one that involved a load of research, I felt like just having a little fun here. Twitter has taken over the NBA, with almost every player of note (and definitely every player not of note) having their own page. However, as Socrates said, when there is something real there’s gonna be some fake ass shit to go along with it.
(Wait…that wasn’t Socrates? Aristotle? Plato? I know it was a Greek philosopher of some kind. And no it was not the guy who runs the souvlaki bar on The Grand Parade. I think).
Anyway, in many cases the fake Twitters are more fun than the real ones. So here’s my list of the best NBA-related fake Twitter accounts.
The Bill Walton Trip (https://twitter.com/#!/NotBillWalton)
Widely considered the pinnacle of all fake NBA twitter pages to the point where he was quoted as the real Bill Walton in an LA Times article. Not consistently funny but, he does get a lot of Walton-isms down.
James Harden’s Beard (https://twitter.com/#!/HardenBeard)
It’s a hard life being the most impressive beard in the NBA since Baron Davis was in his prime. However, @HardenBeard takes it in his stride as he keeps us up to date with the latest goings-on in his and his hosts’ life. Quite the ladies’ beard also, plus he replies to tweets at times.
Charles Barkley (https://twitter.com/#!/NotChuckBarkley)
For whatever reason, Sir Charles refuses to Tweet (I still don’t get why). While there are several fake Barkley’s out there, this one is one of the most popular and for good reason cause many of the others are turrible. This guy really gets the Barkley mannerisms and sayings down pat.
Emo Chris Bosh (https://twitter.com/#!/EmoChrisBosh)
You know what’s really difficult? Being Chris Bosh. When you’re the most underappreciated member of Miami’s big 3, mocked by everyone from rival players to fans to teammates…it just builds up so much painful emotion.
Mikhail Prokhorov https://twitter.com/#!/Fake_Prokhorov)
I’m a bit worried about this one cause I am scared that it may be the real thing and I don’t really plan to wake up in a Siberian cell. I’m sure Mr Prokhorov can easily find out that all he needs to do to kidnap me is have a hot Russian chick serve me spiked vodka. Still, it’s a great Twitter account.
Not Kris Humphries (https://twitter.com/#!/Kris_Humphries)
Anyone who follows me on Twitter knows my fourth favourite activity on the site (after making scene kids cry, trying to get naked photos of said underage scene chicks and posting my own nudes) is trolling the Kardashian sisters’ accounts. (Not Kendall though, cause she’s hot and barely legal). However I have no comparison to this fake Kris Humphries. He’s just started Tweeting again also. A must follow.
Bonus Mention – DJ Leon Smith’s Balls (https://twitter.com/#!/djleonsmithball)
Not NBA-related, but long time friend of NBAMate DJ Leon Smith has balls with their own Twitter account. Worth a follow.
And just in case you wanna follow me – I’m @YoSoyFiesta_.